The Comedy of Errors

"If he's Satan's Lap Tampon, who would be, I dunno, Satan's Disco Monkey?"

"Is pink the new orange?"

"BOME!"

"Welcome to the House of Funny Thoughts..."

"Oh my fucking... ASS!"

"I'm getting TRAINed for new stuff at work... yeah, they're having two people TRAIN me... come on ride the TRAIN..."

"Tag, you're it!"

"I am La Chica Del Bano!"

"Beth Milk Lot Boots?"

"I'm not from your country..."
"Where are you from?"
"NOT... YOUR...COUNTRY!"

"Where am I going, and why am I in this handbasket?"
"That's what Toto said."

"Unless it means that Satan's gonna fly out of my ass..."

"OOOh, I'd be a meal! I'd be a happy meal!"

"Copy-you-know-damn-rrrrright"

"Leavin on a southern train GIVE IT AWAY NOW!"

"I went out with this girl once, and she dumped me for my dad... just because she liked his name!"

"Ah shit. I thought this would lead somewhere, but obviously, it didn't."

"Someone walked off with my whole posse..."

"...and left me with these fuckers."

"Dear God, please don't lead me through all sorts of bumfuck. Lots of love, Beth."

"We should teach them how to play Splungeonese Tag."

"H.B.D.P."

"You think the Thong Avenger has no challenge? Meet the G-STRING GLADIATOR!"

"Splunge is for SPLUNGE!"

"Where did you get your virginity from?" "Clother Hall. I rented it out for the night."

"The word 'Yeah' is almost as versatile as the word 'fuck'..."

"Whoa, there goes my finger!"

"His house could burn down, and he would come home, take a look, and think, 'Hmmm... somebody just walked off with my whole house!'"

"Fuck my opening line!"

"The entire world could come crashing down and my first thought would be, 'Where are my damn cigarettes?'"

"Peupty-peupty-pants-ss"

"WHO-IS-HERE?" "Nobody special."

"Something. It was definitely something."

"It's just you, me, the fucking pen, and the notebook."

"Thwapata!"

"If you were a Skittle flavor, which one would you be?"

"DESTRUCTO DISC!"

"Who's the asshole that signed your day pass?"

"BOOSHI!"

"Clunk Clunk Clunk Cake!"

"Take away my tacos? That would be a fate worse than death!"

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